Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
it hurts more in the daytime
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
try to milk me bitch
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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