haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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