My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
