Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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