That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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