then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
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