Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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