Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
