I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
