I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
