you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
