i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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