to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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