were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I stole a fireplace last night.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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