It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
