He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
