it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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