New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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