hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
