She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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