I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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