He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
