Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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