How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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