the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
