KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize