is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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