she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
