physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
