pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize