I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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