If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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