No awkward lesbian experiences without me
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
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