I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
