I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
