My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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