3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
How's work?
Spinning.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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