Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
My vagina just recognized that song.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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