I will die if light touches me.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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