So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
