Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Are we still banned from the library?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
