he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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