I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
