I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
