Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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