He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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