After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
