Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
