if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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