no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
